• The Loop:
  T-Mobile offers iPhone trade-in deal http://loopu.in/16MCAk0 

@theloop Trade-in “not available in District of Columbia”. Any idea why? Also, no swap program for 5 owners; TMo version 1st with HSPA+.

• Melody Kramer:
  1) Put on nice outfit 2) Go to coffee shop to write emails 3) Spill coffee all over nice outfit. 4) ??? 5) Profit

@mkramer 4) buy stock in companies focusing on production of nice, brownish, quick-drying outfits

I am exactly 43 1/3 today. Or, as my people call it, 1/3 of the way to my dekabar mitzvah.

• Lex Friedman:
  Buy your tickets for One More Thing now! RT @omtconf: 1 day, 3 hours and 47 minutes until early bird tickets end.https://s3.amazonaws.com/decryptiondump/q38yF.png …

@lexfri oh, I hate you with envy so much right now.

• Lex Friedman:
  @jeffporten I get that a lot.

@lexfri I see what you did there.

• Richard Dawkins:
  I can see that Gmail has to make money. And scanning for keywords would be better than reading our mail. But DO they read our mail?

@RichardDawkins not so much “they don’t” as “they can’t”: the volume is way too high. But admins *always* have access if they choose to look

• Quinn Norton:
  Malware mines bitcoin: (also, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

@quinnnorton There are a number of ways to interpret your “hahaha” comment; which is accurate?

• Quinn Norton:
  @jeffporten three of them, only

• Alan Gluck:
  Passenger Terminal Expo 2013. Room J (follow the orange footprints. (@ Geneva Palexpo w/ 2 others) http://4sq.com/10EdnWz 

@Airport_Guy orange footprints are a known drawback of the brown acid.

• Laila Lalami:
  Immigration, a lexicon. You’re a ‘migrant’ when you’re very poor; ‘immigrant’ when you’re not so poor; and ‘expat’ when you’re rich.

@jamiekilstein Please stop retweeting Clarence Thomas. It’s turning my iPhone stupid.

• Kirk McElhearn:
  At the Holiday Inn Express in Marseille for my last night in France.

@mcelhearn I can empathize. http://www.jeffporten.com/?p=350 

• Kirk McElhearn:
  @jeffporten That was a long time ago. Hotels in France have changed a great deal since then. Many low-priced international chains now.

@mcelhearn Actually, it was kind of cool (says the guy who wants to try a Tokyo coffin hotel).

• Melody Kramer:
  If anyone would a) like to grab a drink on Thursday evening and b) you live in Washington DC, let me know. I will be at @kramerbooks.

@mkramer Where you really should get a discount.

• Sixth Form Poet:
  Suzanne Vega has a daughter, so clearly what happens in Vegas doesn’t always stay in Vegas.

• Glenn Fleishman:
  I’ll take “the Penis Mightier” for $800, Trebek.

@GlennF Damn, you should have tried that on the actual show, just to see the reaction.

• Glenn Fleishman:
  @jeffporten Oh, they have heard every variation. They warn you about being too cute.

@GlennF That inspires an SNL metajoke about Trebek deliberately nailing a contestant to the wall. “It was to-MAY-to. You said to-MAH-to.”

• Glenn Fleishman:
  @jeffporten I mispronounced Keynes and I write for the Economist. And Alex corrected me. And I knew how to say his name correctly. =

@GlennF Finally, an explanation for why they make you use your initials. :-)

• Dan Frakes:
  Spent some time with Ulysses III today. First impression: Fantastic.

@danfrakes Let me guess: it comes in Paid and Lashed-to-the-Mast versions?

• Glenn Fleishman:
  Had a terrible idea today for parents. Get tattoos on your body marking the height of your children as they age.

@GlennF Well, it’s a better idea than attempting to tattoo the children.

• Seth Trueger:
  @jeffporten @GlennF if you tattoo the children, you only have to do it once

@MDaware @glennf Yes, but you have to tattoo on the mathematical tangent with the top of their heads. I think that’s impossible.

Bronze Medal of the Will #smallerfilms @scalzi sucked me into this.

A Little Forgiven, But Still in the Doghouse (and the Whorehouse) #smallerfilms

Django Untied #smallerfilms

Godson #smallerfilms

• Kirk McElhearn:
  If you want to access all my iTunes Guy articles on Macworld, you can do so from this link: http://www.macworld.com/column/itunes-guy/ …

@mcelhearn URL subject to change to “itunes-bloke” shortly.

• Harry McCracken:
  Trying to have the Mandalay Bay remove an accurate charge from my bill. Rep insists that their refreshment-center sensors are infallible.

@harrymccracken First rule of dealing with Vegas hotels: ALWAYS call a casino host. They grease the wheels.

• Jesse Spector:
  Ooh, email saying my Klout got a boost. Tweeting about celebrity sex works fast.

@jessespector Being photographed having sex with a celebrity is even better.

• Jesse Spector:
  @jeffporten But that leads to problems including but not limited to herpes and divorce.

@jessespector You didn’t pre-arrange a List agreement?